That New York newbie Struggle

It was bound to happen. The city was giving so much love that it was time for a New York lesson to balance frequency. I made my way to the C train, already feeling off from the group of aggressive males arguing over recycling on the stoop of my new stay. Yes, that actually happened.

Good intentions

I did not have a plan for the evening, instead, I left it to “good” spirits to guide me to a chill neighborhood with anticipated sightseeing or good conversations at a bar. After roaming the Clinton Hill area for 20 minutes I locked in on a bar. From the outside, it gave the impression of being low key. Upon entrance, I discover the bar infested with couples, all primped up with a shield of, “Do not interrupt our love” hovering around each pair. I decide to take my chances and find a lonesome barstool. While trying to play cool like I am waiting for someone (social awkwardness is just sad, and that was me.) I studied the single overworked bartender recognizing that he wanted to get out of there just as much as me. I left.

Bad results

I fool around in Clinton Hill a bit longer in case anything does happen, really not wanting to head back to my underwhelming and overly loud area. Eventually, I check the maps to head home discovering it was ANOTHER 20-minute walk to the subway station. Where the hell was I? Trekking further into the unknown (my maps lead me this way), panic infused my veins as fewer people are in view and increase of unsettling buildings take place. Eventually. Eventually, I locate the general premise of the subway, as I reach for that bendy yellow Metro card, not in my right pocket, not in left pocket (shit, shit) Top right? No. Top left? No. I give up! Tears flood my sinus cavities and stream down my cheeks. I was so exhausted from feeling lost and here I lose my 1week in 100 dollar-bill-yo monthly Metro.

I sit on the nearest bench to sulk in my own pity. I am sure through my dreadful mind that everyone passing thinks,”Poor girl cannot handle New York.”

I find that Army General persona within us all and internally yell,”THIS IS LIFE NEW YORKER! GETUP! GET HOME!” For the first time, I understand the Emergency Only Exit doors are also a gateway for free subway rides.  I figure I lost enough and catch the door as a stranger passes by.

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